THe importance of expressing our needs
I have always perceived myself as a giver, as a person that enjoys to provide for those I care for and to see them living happy and healthy lives. We are more able to give to others when we are providing from a place of wholeness, when our cup is full and when we are providing ourselves with all we need. Taking adequate rest, practicing self care and self love to nurture ourselves.
Self love is different for each person, this can be cultivated by eating healthy food that nourishes us, to exercising, meditating, or paying attention to the way we dress, to self massage and self pleasure. Even brushing our teeth twice a day is an act of self love in my opinion.
Even though we could be actively meeting our own needs as much as we can we are social beings and we have human needs of connection and receiving love. Feeling comfortable to receive and being open to receive has been something I have been working on for years, starting with generating feelings of self worth, to programme my subconscious that I am worthy to receive and then softening and opening to feelings of guilt that were arising when I was receiving care and love and compassion from those close to me.
It has been a gradual process to feel comfortable with this and I still occasionally feel guilt rising when I am being cared for. One thing that became clear to me is that if you block yourself from receiving you attract people into your life that are happy to take and by relaxing into the flow of giving and receiving you provide the gift of giving to another.
'People that do not allow themselves to receive attract people that only desire to take.'
My process with receiving has now upgraded into another level that I am working on in my relationships to express my needs. I observed a pattern that was arising that I would expect my needs to be met without expressing them and then be disappointed when these mysterious needs were not met. The key to this is having no attachment to the needs being fulfilled, if the other person is capable and happy to meet them then there is a beautiful synergy, and if not then I am still feeling seen in the expression of my desires and bringing awareness to my desires so they can potentially be met at another time.
I encourage you to set a goal for yourself to express your needs to someone the next time they arise without expecting them to be met. I have saying that people that do not allow themselves to receive attract people that only desire to take. Know you are worthy of receiving and the more you express what you need the more fulfilling and harmonious life becomes.
